Ronke Abidoye
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  • Home
  • About
    • Who is Abba?
  • Blog
    • Internal Dialog
    • the jane review
  • Books/Stories
    • Palaver
    • The Perfection in Love
    • Short Stories >
      • caption
      • The Other Woman
      • Easier to Run - Sade's Story
      • One-Sentence Stories
    • Spotlight
  • Contact
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YOUR CART

Back here, again. 

I am back here, again.
Tired, worried, scared, not understanding, doubting, and scared about doubting.
Worse still, I don't want to feel this way.
I want to be happy. I want to thank God for today, a day that marks my entry into this world.
I want to appreciate this Holy week. I want to feel the joy of Easter.
I really do.
But I am not. And I am scared that I might not make it back this time.
That I may not feel that joy of salvation again.

I am too weak.
Too weak, Lord.
I need You.
​

You are not the bad guy here, Lord.
I am. Somehow, I must be doing something wrong.
I must be...no, I know I am doing something wrong.
I am holding on.
To everything but You.

But I wanna hold You, Daddy.
Jesus, I want You.
Will You help me?
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