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12/18/2017 Comments

Day 24 - Sometimes I Get Angry

Let's skip past the part where I explain that I am not claiming to be perfect by saying I get angry sometimes. 
Yeah? Cool.

Okay!
Sometimes I get angry at God. I don't like it, and it hurts me to write it, but it's true.
And I know. I mean, we all know...
That God does everything right, and there is literally no justifiable reason in the world to get mad at Him.* 
But I do. Because it doesn't always feel that way. 
And those pesky little things called feelings have a way of overshadowing everything else including faith, if you let them.
But I don't want to let them, at least not the negative ones that make me doubt and mistrust the One I love. 

Love is a feeling, too. It's really more than just a feeling - but a feeling, nonetheless. 
And that's what I want to feel. That's what I want to choose to feel. Always.
Love. Love. Love. 

When I get in trouble for forgetting and I wonder why the Lord didn't remind me...I want to choose love.
When I hear of wildfires, hurricanes and earthquake events, even though I don't fully understand why the Lord does not stop them...I want to choose love.
When I am too depressed to breathe, I want to choose love.

Because it overcomes fear. It overcomes doubt. It does not get mad. It understands. It cares. It trusts. 
Because It is Who God is. 
And I really, really, really like Who God is.

Teach me to choose love, Lord. 
*See Romans 3:4, Jeremiah 29:11
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